Zucchini Bread in 24.5* Simple Steps

Some of my favorite bloggers post recipes, either on occasion or as a regular feature of their blog.  They all take beautiful photos of their creations, and post step-by-step instructions so fool-proof that even a novice like me can follow them. 

By the way, my favorite is The Pioneer Woman.  If you've never been to her blog, you must.  Rhee Drummond is an amazing cook, author, gardener, home-schooler, photographer, rancher, interior decorator ... the list goes on and on.  And she's funny.  I just love the way she writes, the phrasing that she uses, and her down-to-earthness (if that's a word).  Just amazing. 

For me, cooking is nothing short of a disaster.  The only thing worse is baking.  I hate it.  I'm not good at it.  And for some reason, every so often I feel compelled to do it.  Take today, for example.

As I type, I have 2 loaves of zucchini bread baking in the oven.  It smells heavenly, they look like they're coming along just fine, but still I wait to see the end result with a bit of trepidation. 

While I'm waiting, I thought I'd share my recipe for zucchini bread from my friend, Terrill (a.k.a. the lady who used to bring loaves of zucchini bread to our house which the kids would DEVOUR instantly).  But since I'm not a baker and not much of a blogger, my recipe post will be done my way.  No pictures, just a description of how it all went down ...

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STEP 1:  Get the bright idea at 7am that today is a good day to bake some zucchini bread.

STEP 2:  After dropping Jack at preschool, stop at the store and buy a big ol' bag full of zucchini.

STEP 3:  Get home and realize that the recipe will make enough for 2 loaves, and I only have 1 loaf pan.  Proceed to spend the next 20 minutes texting my friends to see who has a loaf pan I can borrow.

STEP 4:  Start looking for food processor to shred the 3 cups of zucchini I'll need.  Not in the pantry cabinet.  Not in the basement.  There it is!  In the back of the bottom cabinets.

STEP 5:  Spend 20 minutes trying to remember how to put food processor together so that it works.

STEP 5.5*:  E-mail Terrill to ask specific questions about the recipe.  Do I need to peel the zucchini? (no) Do I need to remove seeds? (no)  Do I need to remove any of the excess liquid? (no)

STEP 6:  Begin shredding zucchini.

STEP 7:  Stop to take a phone call from Molly who is responding to my text.  "What's a loaf pan?" she says.  I'm in good company.

STEP 8:  Back to shredding zucchini.

STEP 9:  Stop to make lunch for Jack and his friend that is over for a play date.

STEP 10:  Back to shredding zucchini.

STEP 11:  Stop to see if everyone is okay after the boys fall on the hardwood floors while chasing each other around in socks.

STEP 12:  Back to shredding zucchini.

STEP 13:  Stop to answer door for Trisha who has brought over a loaf pan for me to use.

STEP 14:  Zucchini is ready, time to add next ingredients.

STEP 15:  Beat 3 eggs.  Drop one on floor, spend 20 minutes trying to figure out how to wipe a raw egg off of the floor.  Mop floor.

STEP 16:  Add 3 tsp. vanilla, but realize that you only have 2-1/2 tsp.  Figure that's fine, but little voice in back of head reminds me that baking is an exact science, which I often neglect to pay attention to.  Thus, my poor results.

STEP 17:  Add the sugar, oil, flour, baking soda and baking powder.  Wonder how long I've had that baking soda, if it's still good, and what bad baking soda would do to a recipe.  The whole "exact science" thing enters my head again.

STEP 18:  Add the 3 cups of shredded zucchini and mix well.

STEP 19:  Pour into 2 greased and floured loaf pans.  Thanks Trish!

STEP 20:  Bake in 350-degree oven for 1 hr.

STEP 21:  Put Jack down for nap, do a load of laundry, unload and load dishwasher, and type blog post about making zucchini bread while waiting for bread to finish baking.

STEP 22:  Remove pans from oven and place on rack to cool.  Try to check doneness with a toothpick, but remember we're out of toothpicks.  And my trip to the grocery store this morning was about the 10th consecutive trip where I've forgotten to buy toothpicks.  Use a wooden BBQ skewer instead.

STEP 23:  Remove from pan to finish cooling, and wait for girls to get home from school.


no, it's not your imagination ... one loaf is WAY bigger than the other one


STEP 24:  Cut up bread and serve a piece to each of the kids, waiting for their reaction.  In case they hate it, I try to decide on whether to blame the missing 1/2 tsp of vanilla extract or the baking soda that had probably gone bad.  It may sound defensive, but I'm still a bit raw from the whole "Lemon Cake incident" when Jack and Kara yelled to Mark, "Don't eat it!  It tastes like undies!"  True story.

Drum roll ....

They like it!

So there you have it ... zucchini bread in 24.5* simple steps.  And for the record, it only took 9 hours from start to finish.  Not bad!

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Terrill's (famous in my house) Zucchini Bread

3 eggs                                          3 cups shredded zucchini

2 cups sugar                                3 cups flour

1 cup vegetable oil                        1/4 tsp. baking powder

3 tsp. vanilla                                 1 tsp. baking soda

1 tsp. salt                                     3 tsp. cinnamon

Beat eggs.  Add sugar, oil and vanilla.  Add remaining ingredients and mix well.  Pour into (2) greased and floured bread pans.  Bake 1 hour at 350.  (check for doneness with toothpick.  If toothpick comes out clean it is done).

p.s. for those of you thinking, "wow, that's a lot of sugar" or "wow, that's a lot of oil", I know.  But I also know I'm nowhere near competent enough to make replacements on ingredients to try for a more low-sugar, low-fat version.  Besides, I really don't care.  Have you seen how tiny my kids are?!

*Why is there a step 5.5 you say?  Because after I got to the end I realized I forgot one, and was too lazy to go back and re-number the other steps that followed.